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Waking Up in a Mental Hospital Psych Ward January 6, 2010

Posted by Crazy Mermaid in Involuntary Committment, mental illness, Psych Ward, Psychotic.
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I awoke laying on the bed, covered by a sheet and a light yellow blanket. There wasn’t a soul around.   I had no idea where I was or what I was doing there. The last thing I remembered was being wrestled and pinned onto a red four-point restraining board at the hospital emergency room and then being strapped in and  shot up with some kind of drug. After that, I didn’t remember a thing. I didn’t know what day it was, or what time of the day it was.  I had no purse, no money, no identification.  No bra, no underwear, no shoes, no pants, no shirt.  Nothing but my hospital gown.  And my voices and delusions.

My rights had been taken away from me, for no reason.  I was a prisoner and I hadn’t even had a trial. I couldn’t go anywhere.  I couldn’t leave the locked room with the furniture bolted to the floor.  Even if I were allowed to leave, I had no clothes, no shoes, and no money.

Someone asked me later on if I was scared at that point. No, I wasn’t scared.  I was angry. No, I take that back. WE were angry.  All of my voices and I were very, very angry. We couldn’t get over the fact that wherever I was, I was being held against my will. I was being treated as if I had no rights.

I don’t remember exactly when I learned that I had been involuntarily committed to the psychiatric ward of a mental hospital. But I do remember that I simply couldn’t wrap my brain around the fact that in this day and age I could be whisked away illegally from my home and locked in a room with nothing but a bed bolted to the floor. I couldn’t believe it!  I was in shock.

It turned out to be the morning of the 29th of May 2008.  It had been 24 hours since I had entered a hospital Emergency Room.

Note: Under the laws of Washington State, the mental hospital could hold me for up to 72 hours against my will without having to undergo any legal proceedings.

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Comments»

1. Sleight of Hand « The Other Side of Madness - January 8, 2010

[…] psychological crisis, state hospital) Crazy Mermaid’s account of her psychological crisis and involuntary hospitalization is the most articulate and candid narrative on the subject I have read in a long time, and once my […]

2. Serial Insomniac - January 9, 2010

Hi CM. I can only imagine as to how angry you must have been; it genuinely sounds horrific. Whilst I can understand why it is done, it is nonetheless shocking that this is the treatment one can expect if an illness becomes serious enough. It does horrify me that a criminal can expect to be treated better than someone who is sick!

A side note: thanks for your comment on my blog the other day. Don’t worry, all of the posts except that one a few weeks ago (I’ll email you the password) are completely public. I only password-protected one because it reported my having done something I shouldn’t and I didn’t want to risk C finding out. All the others are completely open and free for anyone to access as normal 🙂

Take care x


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