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Sam The Psycho October 16, 2009

Posted by Crazy Mermaid in Delusions, Hallucinations, Hearing Voices, mental illness.
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Walking into the mental illness support group, I was surprised to see two teenage boys sitting side by side in our small circle of chairs. Very few young people come to support groups.

It was clear from Sam’s glassy and brilliant eyes that he was the one with the mental illness, and that his friend, Carl, had simply been the means of Sam’s transportation to the meeting. Later on, we learned that Sam’s mom had actually talked Carl into bringing Sam here. I surmise that Sam wouldn’t get in the car with his mom. Or vice-versa.

When Sam’s turn came to share, he said he was getting more violent against his mom, and that he was having trouble with his relationship with her. His principal complaint was that she didn’t agree with his religious views.

He claimed that he and God were buddies.  He also claimed to be possessed by the devil and demons. He said he was routinely roused from sleep by the demons’ violence against him.  They punched him and pushed him and yanked his hair while he tried to sleep. Oh yeah: and he said he wasn’t mentally ill. He was just possessed.

Initially, he and his friend sat quietly listening to the three of us share our stories. But as time progressed, Sam was increasingly claimed by his invisible friends.  Talking and laughing with them, he faded in and out of our reality.

Sam said he had been taking two anti-psychotics for 2 months. Based on his severe delusions and his statement that he wasn’t mentally ill, I seriously doubt that he was taking his meds at all. His friend said that Sam hadn’t been back to his psychiatrist since he had been given the anti-psychotics. I suspect that was by choice.

Leaving the meeting, I realized the danger Sam’s mother was in. I hoped she had a lock on her door. After all, her teenage son, known to be very angry with her, roamed around the house believing that he was alternately God’s best friend or possessed by the devil and demons. It isn’t a stretch to imagine him slipping into her room at night and slitting her throat or stabbing her as she lay sleeping, convinced that the devil and demons- and maybe God- had directed him to do it. She would be just another dead mother whose soon should have been committed to a mental hospital before he murdered her.

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Comments»

1. Joshua - October 20, 2009

Hi,
This post is especially interesting to me. You are right on with your assessment of Sam and fear for his mother. I was in an outpatient support group back in 2004 where I met Rob. He was roughly my age, late 20s, and seemed stable on his meds. We became fast friends because of our love of sports. We hung out for a couple of years until I moved away from the SRO we were staying at. I would see him later at the clinic, but each time he had a different appearance. At times he was very thin with long hair, other times he was fat, each suggesting that he was on and off with his medication. One day I opened the daily newspaper and found his mug shot on page three. He stabbed and killed his mother and was under psychiatric evaluation. People who come off their meds and seem psychotic should be watched, especially this guy Sam. The consequences can be distastrous. Good entry, but disturbing. I look forward to reading…

-Josh

Crazy Mermaid - October 21, 2009

Part of the story I didn’t share was the way I felt when I returned home. I know this sounds bizarre, but I believe that mentally ill people are more sensitive to paranormal stuff than non-mentally ill people. It just goes with the territory. I try hard to turn that stuff off, since that “door” was wide open while I was psychotic. So anyway, I returned home and went to bed fairly soon after. As I lay in bed, there was a lot of negative energy in that room with me. At one point I’d swear that I felt a hand stroking or pulling my hair. Fortunately for me, the meds act as a sort of “stopper” to prevent that sort of stuff from getting through to me any more. I was able to turn the switch completely off and go to sleep. But it seemed to me that something from Sam had latched onto me. Nothing else happened since. Weird, huh?


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